March 14, 2012
I just want a coherent day
And I try. Boy, do I try. Over and over, I try. I write for my livelihood. All day long. And I find myself getting nowhere. Fast. Normal things, typical decisions allude me right now. It's like when you can touch something with your fingertips, but not fully grasp it. Not that it would matter much, as I can barely grasp things right now anyway. I try to pay attention. I try to listen. And I find myself failing over and over. It's like listening underwater - you can hear something going on, but it doesn't quite get through.
I know it's the inflammation, because this has happened before. Once the inflammation subsides, I'm coherent again. It's just gone on for so long this time, that it's starting feeling desperate.
Geez. Some days I'm really quite cheery, aren't I?
at 2:51 PM