Caught off guard

A few days ago, I stopped at Target. I needed to grab a few things on my way home. As I was entering the door, a man quietly asked if I could spare anything for him because he was homeless and hungry. I assured him, in my work clothes, heels, warm coat, and while clutching my Kate Spade handbag, that I didn't. But it troubled me to say it. I quickly got the few things I needed, with that man's pleas on my mind, and got some cash back when I checked out. But when I left, he was gone. Maybe he'd moved on. Maybe security forced him to move on. I don't know what happened to him. What was clear was that I'd lost my opportunity at a second chance.

Now this happened a few days ago. But the encounter troubled me so much. Haunts me still. It was cold. I mean really cold. And this Target isn't in the nicest of neighborhoods, but it also isn't easily accessible if you don't have a car. Where did he come from? Where did he go? And I know so many people don't give to people who ask, assuming they will use it for unsavory things. But I try to give as much as I'm able when I'm asked. Because really, who is going to sit in the cold and humbly ask if someone has food just to be a scam? Not money - but food.

I'm constantly troubled by these types of interactions, trying to decide what is the right thing to do. I am confident that the right answer is always to help someone who asks. But my confliction is what that really means when you don't know someone's story. How can I ever know what true help is to that individual? How do I know what would be truly compassionate for the asker? And how can I be better prepared to give when asked?

I know I can't save everyone. But I also know that if someone asks, I shouldn't turn away. I'm so disappointed I couldn't help him.